unbrevity of lostness

free write.

what is this sense of utter bleh? utter lostness, utter not found, utter wander?
what is this sense of shell? an empty vessel that refuses to be filled.
what is living when life is not really lived?

question
purpose, cause, effect, affect, condition, path

I am
stalling, postponing, refusing, stubborn, wading in the murkiness of sea

 

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